Heart Rings

A ring worn to mark a commitment that is not an engagement - a relationship being taken seriously, a pledge before a long separation, or a commitment between people not seeking marriage.

The tradition of rings exchanged as pledges long predates the modern engagement ring, so it is a continuation rather than a recent invention.

There is no rule about which finger. Many people wear one on the right hand precisely to distinguish it from an engagement ring.

There is no fixed convention, which is part of the point - it is a personal commitment rather than a formal one.

Many wear it on the right hand, specifically so it is not mistaken for an engagement ring.

Others wear it on the left ring finger and move it when circumstances change. Whatever the two people involved agree is correct.

A heart rendered as an outline rather than a filled shape, so the finger or the skin shows through the middle of the motif.

It reads lighter, more contemporary and less overtly sentimental than a solid heart.

It also sits flatter and catches less, which makes it a practical choice for a ring worn every day.

That depends entirely on the recipient, and the motif has more range than it is given credit for.

A large central heart is a declaration. A small heart set into the shoulder of a band is quiet enough that the wearer knows what it means and nobody else necessarily notices.

If you think the recipient would find a central heart too much, the shoulder-set form is usually the right answer.

A heart is a wide shape for its height, so it occupies more of a finger than a round motif of the same nominal size - on a smaller hand a large heart can dominate.

Hold a ruler at the stated dimensions against a finger before deciding.

For a ring meant to be worn daily, smaller is usually better: the motif carries its meaning regardless of scale.

Borrow a ring she already wears on the intended finger and measure its inside diameter against a standard chart. That is far more reliable than estimating.

Failing that, ask someone who would know - it is a smaller loss of surprise than a ring that does not fit.

If the size is genuinely unknown, choose a design that resizes easily: plain shoulders and stones only at the centre rather than set all the way around.

Rose gold has an obvious affinity with the motif and is a popular choice for exactly that reason.

Yellow gold is the more traditional and reads warmer; white gold is the most understated of the three and takes some of the sentimentality out of the shape.

The most practical guide, as always, is what the wearer already owns and reaches for.

Many are. What to look at is the profile and the point at the base of the heart shape, which is the part most likely to catch on knitwear or rub against a neighbouring ring.

A rounded or lower-profile interpretation handles daily wear better than a raised one with a defined point.

Taking it off for manual work and sport prevents most of the damage rings actually suffer.

Not at all. They are given between parents and children, between friends, and bought by people for themselves as often as they are given romantically.

The motif reads as affection generally rather than romance specifically, which is part of why it is so widely used.

A heart ring given for a birthday or a graduation carries no romantic implication unless the giver intends one.

Warm water, a little mild soap and a soft brush, working into the modelling and around any setting where residue collects.

Open and pierced designs need slightly more attention, because there are more edges for residue to sit against.

Where a stone is set, avoid ultrasonic and steam cleaning, and take the ring off before swimming and household cleaning.